• Discover the realities of adopting the older child from foster care!

    Join Gretchen and Andrew as they forge a new family. It's a real wacky, madcap adventure, full of twists and turns and a heck of a lot more interesting than any of those reality shows you see on TV. Please feel free to make as many comments as you like - that's what this site is about - so that those who are in the process of adopting, have gone through it or may consider it, have a forum to exchange views, vent frustrations and brag about triumphs (yours as well as your kids). Look over the posts and pages and let us know what you think. We welcome you to join in at any time! --Gretchen and Andrew

Closing Chapters

  It’s been a long time since I’ve entered anything in this blog.   I’ve noticed that the community at large has spent a lot of time reading it and in the nearly two years it’s been idle, I’ve gotten a lot of traffic.  I’ve also received comments from readers wanting to know information and … Continue reading

Invasion of the Bio Mom

Dear Faithful Followers: I am taking a short break from this blog and here’s why: Bio Mom has been in contact with my daughter.  Illegally, I might add.  Just this evening, she has become a follower of this blog.  I know it’s her as this woman leaves a trail wherever she goes.  And yes, my … Continue reading

Fostering the Adoption

The other day I read a post from “Syrcatgrl” regarding a stressful visit.  She has a 2-year-old child she is fostering and there is visitation between the child and the bio mom.  I really felt for her because, although parental visitation occurred before Andrew and I took Son and Daughter into our homes, that aspect … Continue reading

Truth or Consequences

All kids lie.  It’s no surprise that they steal, either.  It’s part of who they are, going through the whole button-pressing, boundary-testing, driving parent insane kind of thing. What we’re facing around here these days is a cooperative effort.  One kid commits a crime, both cover for it.  Or neither admits to it.  Add to … Continue reading

The Stuff of Giants

Once again, it was time for the monthly group meeting.  As we gathered around a much larger table this time for our customary pizza, soda and salad, it was heartening to see twice the amount of people normally there.  Our group is growing, filling with families who chose the fost/adopt route. And what a variety … Continue reading

Memorial Day

In my family, there have been a number that have served in various conflicts and wars.  My uncle who died last October, served in the Navy.  So did three others, as well as my Dad (Korea).  Two first cousins and my brother-in-law served in Viet Nam.  There’s even an ancestor who served in the Civil … Continue reading

A Healthy Appetite

Poor diets are common to children in foster care.  Often, they come from homes where processed foods are either the normal routine or all that’s available.  Inner city residents often don’t have access to fresh fruits and vegetables, or those that do come their way are nutritionally bereft, like iceberg lettuce.  Canned or takeout, that’s … Continue reading

Guiding Influence

Out of the blue, Daughter announces to us that she’d like to quit her girls’ group.  “It’s really too social for me,” she cites as her reason for quitting, “and I’m not getting anything out of it.” “Well, this is new,” I say.  “What brought this on?” Shrugging shoulders, her usual reply, Daughter states, “Oh, … Continue reading

Son’s Big Day

For all his challenges, Son’s full of surprises, as is any kid, I suppose.  One recent day proved to us he possessed an ability we thought was rather scarce in his world.  Let me tell you about Son’s Big Day. As some of you who are familiar with ADHD know, absolutely everything is fascinating.  Trouble … Continue reading

The Mother of All Sundays

I come not to expect much from Mother’s Day.  After all, I’ve only been a mother for a few years. On my first Mother’s Day four years ago, the kids still were in our foster care and not yet adopted by us.  I was really touched by their efforts to make me breakfast (waffles, but … Continue reading